This Christmas is probably the saddest one I've ever had. For one, I didn't really feel it coming. It felt like it was just another ordinary day. Second, I hated the number of people in malls and the super heavy traffic everyday. Third, it's totally different.

What is it with Christmas 08? My friends even told me it felt like it was just another ordinary day. And I agree. Yesterday, I was even like, "Omg, Noche Buena na pala tom.." Everyday felt the same. Even right now, with just Christmas coming in a matter of hours.

I went to Alabang Town Center yesterday to meet up with Charmaine, Lauren and Jikay. And boy, it took me 2 freakin hours to go there. I hated the traffic flow to and from Town o_o But nevertheless, I sure had fun with my girls <3

Change is inevitable - this I learned from my Socio101 class. And yes, it got me thinking, everything has to change in one way or another. But not all changes that occur will make you happy. What sucks are those that bring you hurt/sadness. And Im in that realm of my life now. Im hurting. Maybe that's the reason I wasn't feeling this holiday. I was too preoccupied with my feelings. It's just really hard to let go of my old ways and learn to start moving forward. I'm not ready to let go. I don't want to. I'm still hoping.

But then again, Christmas is about Jesus. I shouldn't really think of myself and offer this day to Him. He has been there for me - that's why I'm still here...living :)

I wished.
I hoped.
I prayed.

But I guess, I won't get what I totally want this Christmas.

{/Tuesday, December 23, 2008}

Typed by Yours Truly.